CAP, Bishops Storehouse, Life

I went to the Moreno Valley Community Assistance Program (CAP) today to drop off 5 bags of canned food from our Ward's Activity and, yes, I admit it, I wanted to look around, check it out and see if they needed anything else. You know how I am always looking for a good Service project for Scouts and YW...

As I waited for my turn, I looked around and couldn't help but feel the hopelessness and defeat shown on everyone's face, and the longer I stood there, the more my heart broke. CAP is in a strip mall facing the freeway and the room was small, dark and dirty with no ventilation. The seats were filled with waiting women who were just shells of fading humanity without hope or promise of a better life. Awww, man.... can you say depressing?
But, since I am a Serial Volunteer who Is President of the Stop-Me-Before-I-Volunteer

-Again-YES!-Fine!-I-Willl-Do-It Club, as I made small talk to the receptionist I asked if they could use another volunteer. You are NOT going to believe this, but they turned me down. NO? REALLY? A FREE volunteer willing to work in this depressing place? Hellloooooo? Are you serious? Dude.

The CAP volunteer introduced herself and took me to the back where we put down the bags. Now I could really see their setup. Two words: Hell. NO. Smashed boxes, no organization, piles and piles of filthy, dented, old cans that I'm sure were past their expiration dates... my OCD flew into overdrive and I had to concentrate on her kind face and what she was saying because not breathing in my pre-panic attack was NOT an option. Deanna very proudly told me that the clients can get ONE bag of groceries every OTHER month. That's it. ONE BAG EVERY OTHER MONTH. And, get this: they are serving 80-90 families A DAY in Moreno Valley. Of course, they are only open T/Th 10-1...
By the way, they need peanut butter. And canned beans. Tuna, too.

In the afternoon I was in Colton so I swung by the Bishops Storehouse to see if they needed a volunteer for an hour. The difference between the two defies logic. How can they serve the same purpose but are night and day?

I had only a limited amount of time that I could volunteer but hey, the Great and Wise Jenny Eyestone says asking is free... so I did. One of the Brethren in charge realized my awesome potential and put me in charge of opening cases of toilet paper, inserting 5 rolls in each grocery bag, tying the bag in a knot and placing them on the shelf. Hey, works for me... just my speed and I can count to 5 ALL by myself!

The bonus about this job was I had a front row seat to EVERYTHING. I saw the Church members come in to a clean and spacious building with their sealed food orders and the lovely Sister at the desk greet them with a friendly smile and ask them to wait for just a moment until someone could help them. The volunteer would come forward w/a clipboard and the opened order form, the client pushed a shopping cart and off they went shopping... Cereal, flour, sugar, diapers, formula, canned goods, produce, toothbrushes, toilet paper (perfectly placed in bags I might add), meat, milk, eggs, cheese, deodorant... the list is endless and is tailored for the family for a two week period. Hundreds of dollars of FREE groceries later, the client left smiling and grateful. The Church's generosity to it's members may have been humbling but there was HOPE and a true, gentle Spirit that touched your heart. I spent my hour chatting with an elderly Sister Missionary who was hard of hearing but we made a great team as we polished off more than 10 cases. I whipped out a box cutter and tote that barge, lift that bale, we got into a rhythm quickly.

Now, before you start thinking about how wonderful I am and what an Angel I am... ummm... I probably should confess that I had my fake IPOD on, one earbud in and I was DEFINITELY NOT listening to Church appropriate music. Unless Theory of a Deadman is on President Monson's IPOD, I am pretty sure I am still going to Hell. And have a personalized parking space waiting.

Sooooo... after two major melt downs and one pre-panic attack and many, many cold Diet Cokes (all w/GREAT expiration dates) to calm my nerves today, the contrast between the charities made me recognize how lucky I am to not only be part of the greatest Church in the world, but also for the greatest friends anyone could wish for. My family and I could not have made it these last 6 months without my friends who know me, and well... for some reason, still love me! I know they pray for my soul everyday and there are probably 10,000 bonus points if someone can point me in the right direction to Good and Light. Yeah, right. Good luck, baby.

Pride goeth before the fall soooo... my friends won't take no for an answer and give me cans and bottles for recycling, slip me cash at church... Bishop always asks me how I am doing and won't settle for a vague answer. I wigged out at Church on Sunday and Kathleen Clark walked me into a room and listened to me cry and ramble like a crazed woman and didn't once point out how medication and a straight jacket might be next on the agenda...

Craig Rogers was ahead of me in line @ Sam's Club and gave the cashier $40 on the sly to give to me after he left. The look on her face was PRICELESS. She was astonished and asked if I knew him... My reply? Dude. I am CHARMING. It's a GREAT story-- ask and I will tell ALL.

Cindi and Bryan Grover gave me cash @ Christmas to go see my terminal Dad. I started to cry right there in the mall and still tear up at the generosity of a family I have known for 15 years and who has touched my life and made me feel worthwhile in so many ways. I feel lucky to know THEM.

Tracey Hudgens got a call from me pretending I wasn't crying in the parking lot of her work asking to have --not borrow-- $20 to take Samuel to the doctor because I had no money and the school wouldn't let him back in with his cough. (Stupid MVUSD sends out a truant officer to my house but THEY are the ones sending him home every day.... for 10 days... good grief.) She came out w/money and no questions asked, hugged me and as I told her I would never be able to pay her back but I would always feel grateful and guilty, Tracey just shook her head and gave me THAT LOOK. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it.

Cindy Martin buys dog food (for 6 months now) for Jack, Rex and Rocky and once gave me a whole cup of pennies ($9.70!) for gas, and made me popcorn every day when all I could keep down was Popsicles, her popcorn and Diet Coke. (The bright side of depression and the total annihilation of my spirit is I stopped eating and lost 50 pounds. Yup. Not a diet I would recommend but I LOVE my size 9 jeans...)

Chantal... awww, man... Chantal... who should be called the Bank of Chantal, fills my gas tank, buys me detergent, and talks me off the-cliff-that-calls-my-name EVERY time and always knows the right thing to say no matter how angry, rambling or pathetic I am, no matter what time of day or night.

Then there is my golfing buddy and partner in crime, straight man to my irreverent comedy, Jennifer who supports my Diet Coke habit, checks the expiration date faithfully and picks up the pieces of my broken and battered soul EVERY time... and somehow still loves me even though we both know I desperately want to be the better golfer. Oh. Wait. I am.

The love of my life (wink, wink) who recognized my defeated, broken spirit and text me for hours as I stood in the never-ending Welfare line for the first time EVER in my life to keep me sane and functioning. The same friend who text me over and over to make me feel anything BUT a failure, let me take out my frustration and anger, who recognized my reluctance to go home... How can you ever thank someone who still loves you even though you are certifiable? I will never be able to repay you, and I will always feel grateful and guilty, but I can honestly say that I love you the most, you are my favorite.

So many stories...

It's been a long six months that included the shock of my Dad's diagnosis of terminal cancer and his death 4 months later on Dec. 27, 2009... begging, borrowing, cajoling, promising ANYTHING to get the money/time/abilbity to finance 3 trips to Hawaii to try and cram a lifetime of memories with my favorite Dad into weeks... Alan's continued unemployment... repossession of his car... church assistance... denial of Welfare and then the mistake corrected (good thing I called!)... getting through my semester with the help of the most wonderful teachers (2 A's and 1 B)... 8 weeks of Hickory Farms w/the most AMAZING women on the planet who took care of me as I fell apart and where the phrase "Medic! Man down!" meant fill me with Diet Coke until numb, the same women who had the guts to scold me for chasing two 3-strike felons who stole from us. (Hey. I wanted my $6 back and they needed to know who they were dealing with)... my HF boss who bought two bags of food for Thanksgiving for my family (shhh... don't tell her about the felons... it's our secret!)... on the lighter side, I now know that I can buy Slurpees at 7-11 with my EBT card. Thanks, Rhonda... I needed that.

Sniff, sniff... I need Kleenex... Medic... man down... where's my Diet Coke?

But for all my ridiculously AMAZING, unbelievable amount of bad luck, the last six months have shown me I am truly the luckiest woman on the planet to have so many loyal, 5 minute friends. Because, for how little I have, I have sooooo much more than those broken, defeated, lifeless women @ CAP.

'Nuff said. Let's go play golf.
30

My love/hate relationship with WalMart

I hate WalMart. I can't say it enough! I hate them, hate them, hate them and yet tomorrow, I would be shopping there again muttering "I hate WalMart" under my breath all the way out the door.

Last week I went to WalMart to make some returns. Nothing was used, all were in the correct packages, all recently bought and all well within the return time range...did I mention that I had the receipts for each item? Well, one of the items was a book. The Friday Night Knitting Club, actually. My book group chose this book for March and I ran out to buy it at Costco with my milk, eggs and toilet paper but Costco was sold out. Then I went to Sam's Club and they were out. Now it was late and all the good stores were closed but I was determined to buy it. I went to the Moreno Beach 24 hr.WalMart and had to look through messy shelves and trashed merchandise but I found two copies. Hurrah! One copy was really icky so I bought the other ($11.83) and ran home so I could read it right away.

I was so excited! I get home, get comfortable, open the book...and...the pages inside are trashed. They look like they were cut with a knife! ARGHHH! I give up. Obviously, this was not meant to be. The next day I go to Target and buy a copy ($11.23--saved some money!) and start my book. (It's really good--I recommend it.)

A few days later, I am at the same WalMart returning a few things. Nothing exciting...the luggage tag for Alana that I thought was a softball, turned out to be a baseball ($4) and some clips for the softball banner ($1.96). Big whoops. Then, I give them the book. Good grief! It was like Fort Knox shutting down! Oh no, they can't take returns on books due to copyright laws. Wait. I have the receipt, I didn't read it, I brought it back as soon as I could and WalMart won't give me my money back? I tell the lady that I can return books at Costco, at Waldenbooks...why can't WalMart take it back? I go over it again; I have the receipt, I didn't read it, the book is trashed! It's like talking to a wall. I am so calm but my eyebrows are receding back into my hairline because I am so incredulous. She calls over another woman because this monumental decision is over her capability as a supervisor and that one tells me no also. (How do you get hired at WalMart? Do you have your parole officer vouch for you?) They want to give me another copy, I tell them I all ready bought one at Target (cheaper too!) so why do I need two copies? Now they are both snotty and I am uncharacteristically quiet as I try to figure out how much of a big deal I want to make of this. The more they tell me no, the more I want my money back!

Finally, after we go back and forth, the supervisor gives up and gives me store credit. (It's didn't really matter if it was cash or credit--I was going in to buy dish soap, paper towels, etc)
It goes with out saying that I will never buy another book from WalMart. Ever. How frustrating!

Of course, not as frustrating as the time the customer service guy told the 20+ people in line behind me that the fabric return I had (with receipt!) I had stolen...

I hate WalMart.

Free Speech

"He's harmless. Back in the '60s he was part of the free speech movement at Berkeley. I think he did a little too much LDS." ~ Captain Kirk in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”

-Nelson Mandela

"People wonder what we do for our women. I'll tell you what we do. We get out of their way and look with wonder at what they're accomplishing." President Gordon B. Hinckley

“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. The fact is that most putts don’t drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to be just like people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, and most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is just like an old time rail journey … delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.”

President Gordon B. Hinkley

Some people are like slinkies. Not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

Check out Freerice.com. It is the coolest site! It tests your knowledge of English, Chemistry and Math and with each correct answer, rice is donated to the poor. It is so much fun but so addicting.  

I take my chocolate black please.

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Chocolate Mug Cake....This is a real recipe

3 MINUTE CHOCOLATE MUG CAKE

1 Coffee Mug

4 tablespoons flour (that's plain flour, not self-rising)

4 tablespoons sugar

2 tablespoons baking cocoa

1 egg

3 tablespoons milk

3 tablespoons oil

3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)

Small splash of vanilla

Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well. Add the egg and mix thoroughly.
Pour in the milk and oil and mix well. Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla, and mix again. Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.
The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don't be alarmed!
Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired or just eat it out of the mug with a spoon.

PS:
We made this for Young Women one night and the girls LOVED it! It's so cool to watch the cake rise out of the mug.

One banana, two...

Banana-Cream Cheesecake

1 pkg. (2-layer size) white cake mix, divided
4 eggs, divided
3 Tbsp. oil
2/3 cup packed brown sugar, divided
2 bananas, sliced
2 pkg (8 oz each) Philadelphia cream cheese, softened
2 Tbsp. lemon juice
1 1/2 cups milk
1 1/2 cups thawed Cool Whip Whipped topping

Heat oven to 300 F. Reserve 1 cup dry cake mix. Mix remaining cake mix with 1 egg, oil and 1/3 cup brown sugar with mixer. (Mixture will be crumbly) Press into bottom and 1 inch up sides of greased 13X9-inch baking pan; top with bananas.
Beat cream cheese and remaining sugar with mixer. Add reserved cake mix, remaining eggs and lemon juice; beat 1 minute. Blend in milk. (Batter will be thin) Pour into crust.
Bake 45-50 minutes or until center is almost set. Cool. Refrigerate 4 hours. Top with Cool Whip. Refrigerate any leftovers.

Kraft Food and Family Fall 2008

I made this recently and everyone loved it. Next time I make this, I think I will try some variations like chocolate cake mix instead of white or even sliced strawberries instead of bananas with a lemon or chocolate cake mix.
What a great recipe (and a great size) to take to a pot-luck!